wondering if maybe or     not it's noticed how
naturally i amjust            there
how empty just empty
words are just wordslike not
at all, just                       there

a touch                                sending
                                        wa vves

opened a dream
at the back of the neck

my arenot's

i'd have you, build around you

i still think      you
like coffee stains let sit, orange with age,
they still smell the same

i wish i could breathe    you
and have you sit in my lungs, i could
make room, at least
i could try

build a lean-to, i'd have you

what could I be doing? writing this. now?
what could I be doing with
all this space and       this BIGbig time
thing that is so
damn
consum-
ing like a
vacuum just

disappear into something that you never
get to
re-visit just try to
replace but that gets
used up, too

not a very sustainable
feeling, not a very
worth-while
practice, is
it?

no. rather jump on
a train than sit here and watch it happen to
everyone I care about, rather
sink inside and re-emerge every day feeling
brand-new than constantly
wasted, taken apart

little bit by
piece by
inch
by

day by
day